Being Brave
What
does it mean to be brave? Choosing to
be brave is not a destination, but a journey that is traveled every day. Being brave is a choice. It does not have to be a magnificent
act. Practicing or making the choice to
be brave can be about the choice to go through the process of overcoming a fear
or doing something even though you are scared.
As a Montessori educator, being brave is a duty of the guide for the
sake of both the children and families.
I have tremendous gratitude for Judith Cunningham, Michael Jacobson and
the Montessori Model United Nations. It
is because of them, and the forum that they have created, that I can
communicate and better understand bravery. The children and families also
inspire me to strive to be a good role model and to do myself what I ask of the
children to do.
Last
year, I participated as a President on the Dais for one of the committees at
the Montessori Model United Nations Conference in New York City. I decided to open up the session by asking
the delegates (students) what being brave meant to them. Then I shared with them what being brave
meant to me. Next, I encouraged them to
utilize this safe forum to choose to do one thing that scared them or that they
were nervous about. It could be
something such as raising your placard, standing and announcing that you were
present and voting in front of over 60 strangers. Or, if you were scared to meet someone new,
go up to someone in the committee and introduce yourself. I had such an overwhelmingly positive
experience with that and such great feedback that I decided to do it again this
year when I was invited back to be President at the conference again.
I
was definitely tested at the conference to exercise what I thought I needed to
be brave about last year. However, this
year’s biggest test of bravery for me at the conference brought me the greatest
gift of awareness. So, I did my bravery
spiel again, and the search for a resolution on the topic of whaling between
approximately 30 countries and 60 delegates began. The room was buzzing; excitement was in the
air. Twenty to thirty parents were in
the room observing in the back at any given time. While everything was moving wonderfully,
something different was happening this year that I had not experienced
before. Parents were trying to involve
themselves.
They
were passing notes to the children, which I did not find out about until later
in the day, and it was not just in my room.
Some were actually trying to influence their children. Then, in the afternoon, a parent yelled
across the room after a vote and said, “I don’t think the children understand.” I was shocked; this is not supposed to
happen in a Montessori environment, let alone a Montessori Model United Nations
environment. I had a flash of being at a baseball game and seeing a parent
obnoxiously yelling to the children.
This was not okay. However, it
was the end of the session and the parent privately apologized. Unfortunately, for me, this was not over. Something
needed to be done, but what?
For
much of the night I thought about how to handle this situation. How could I change the dynamics that were
being created in this forum? I could
not allow any other parent to think it was okay to interject or continue to
take away the possibility for self-directed learning from any of these
children. In my mind, that was my
responsibility, the children. Something had to be done, and when I realized a
solution that was a possibility, I knew it would not be a popular one. It was going to be difficult, and many
things could go wrong. Yet, I was a
President of a committee, I spoke to the delegates about being brave, education
is my life, and in my heart I knew what I needed to do, despite fears of
possible undesirable outcomes.
It
was not until the session began that I made the final decision. I briefed the Dais about my concern and
unhappiness with regards to how some parents conducted themselves the day
before. Then, I told them that, because
of that, I was going to probably ask the parents to leave the room so that I
could speak privately with the delegates.
I explained to them that I did not recommend this, but based on the
circumstances, I felt it was the right decision to make, for the sake of the
delegates.
And
so, the session began with roll call.
After that, I addressed the parents and let them know that it was not
okay to give negative reactions in the back of the room, pass notes to the
delegates or speak across the forum to express an opinion. With that, I asked them to leave the room
and the Dais would invite them back in approximately ten minutes after the
delegates were addressed.
As
President, I explained to the delegates that voting on draft resolutions was
their decision alone, being on the speaker’s list was their choice, and while
it might be hard, they should not let their parents or chaperone persuade them
during the session. I explained to them
that a parent calling out across the room as one did the previous day was not
okay and just as they are expected to conduct themselves in a certain way, so
are the adults in the back of the room.
Along with that, we reopened the floor to vote on whether the delegates
would like to vote on the current draft resolution without the parents present. The delegates voted in favor of voting on
the draft resolution, and once we did, it passed unanimously. The Dais then invited the parents back into
the room.
At
the end of the conference, parents still shook my hand, complimented me, asked
to have me take a picture with their child, and I also received at least one
apology. This experience taught me
several things. Good things can happen
when you follow your heart. This
experience was about the children and that gave me the courage to follow my
heart, which in turn, led to my experience of making sure I modeled what I
spoke about, being brave.
It
is my hope that, in sharing this story, guides, administrators, and parents can
take away something positive from it. My
purpose was to show a personal story that might help someone else decide to be
brave no matter how big or small the situation. Often times, our imaginations make things
look more scary than they actually are.
I would like to encourage you to share your story or thoughts about being
brave.
